"Pop Life"

Chapter 68

"Cody, stop biting your nails," mama says as she leans over daddy to gently push Cody's fingers from his mouth.

"I'm nervous," he says.

"About what?" daddy asks as he chuckles.

Cody just shrugs.

"How are you feeling?" mama asks me as she leans over to me.

"I'm fine," I say staring straight ahead.

"I think one of your nominations is up next," Uncle Lance leans forward to tell me.

"Oh God," I say.

Mama glances back to look at Uncle Lance. I don't see what she's doing, I just know she's looking at him. She pats my knee.

"Hold my hand," she whispers as we come back from commercial break.

The presenters are announced and walk out to the podium. They make a few jokes and then the nominees are announced.

"Is the camera going to be on me?" I whisper to mama.

She shakes her head. "I think it's there for if you win," she whispers back. "You'll see the red light come on if you are."

"Right," I nod.

The presenters start to open the envelope…

"The winner for Best Pop Video goes to…"

I squeeze mama's hand tighter.

"We Want You That Way by Art's Insanity," the presenters yell.

I let go of mama's hand and applaud. I see mama looking at me out of the corner of my eye. Suddenly it dawns on me…I might not win anything. With five nominations I thought I'd take home at least one, hopefully. But now, after the first award has been announced I realized the voters might not like what I'm doing. There were a few awards that were given out before the show started and I was up for two of them, I think. I think I would have heard if I had won.

"Next one," mama whispers to me.

I give her a reassuring smile.

During the next commercial break mama and daddy leave so that they can go present.

"Ladies and gentleman…please welcome the King and Queen of Popdom…Justin Timberlake and Britney Spears-Timberlake," the host says.

Mama and daddy walk out to the podium, holding hands, their fingers entwined. Mama smiles and waves at the audience as daddy reaches down and touches their hands as he walks by.

"King and Queen, huh?" daddy asks as they reach the podium.

"I want a crown when I get home then," mama nudges him.

"So…the award we're going to present is for Best Group Video. It seems that this is appropriate for us to present since I was and still am in a group," daddy nods.

"And uh…I dated and married someone from a group," mama smiles and shrugs.

The audience laughs. "Seems like a good enough excuse to me to present an award to one of these nominees…"

The nominees are shown and mama looks over at us and waves at Ashleigh who has been trying to get their attention ever since they got up on stage. She is now sitting on my lap and I laugh as she bounces up and down when mama waves to her.

Daddy puts an arm behind mama after the nominee video is shown.

"And the winner is…"

Mama opens the envelope.

"KCB with Don't Change a Thing."

I start clapping really hard and I look around to see where they're sitting. It turns out they're behind me because they walk up the aisle and pass me. When I notice this I turn around in my seat and Bert sees me.

He smiles and winks at me as I cheer for them.

Mama and daddy hand them their moonman statue and step to the side. Daddy puts his arm around mama's waist again.

The guys make their acceptance speech and all head off the stage.

At the next commercial break mama and daddy come back.

"Did you have fun?" I ask.

"Oh yeah," daddy kids.

"You get used to it," mama adds as she sits back down next to me.

"I was so happy that KCB won."

Mama smiles. "They're good boys. You seemed to have made good friends out of them."

"I have," I sigh.

In the next segment, Best Dance Video is up.

I hold onto mama's hand again as the nominees are announced.

"And the winner is…" the envelope is ripped open. "Wanted by Ana."

I feel mama pull my face toward her as she kisses my cheek and we both stand up.

"Oh my God," I say.

Daddy grabs me from around mama and kisses me.

"Go on up," mama says.

Uncle Lance pats me on the back so I turn to him and give him a hug.

I walk up to the podium and take the statue from the presenters.

"Oh God," I say setting the statue on the podium. I can feel my hands shaking. "I've never done this before."

I almost forget which nomination this was for and I look at the envelope and see that it says:
BEST DANCE VIDEO
ANA
WANTED

"I have to thank God first and foremost for blessing me and my family every day. Uncle Lance and Tony and everyone at FreeLance, you guys rock. Joe and his crew for making the video and choreographing it…if it weren't for you, I wouldn't be up here right now, so thanks. For my fans for being so supportive. Barry and Cheryl at Jive, thanks for your help. And last but not least, I have to thank all of my family for their wonderful support and guidance. Mama and daddy, I love you. You guys are my idols…I'll be a lucky person if I even have one tenth of the talent you guys have. I love you. God bless."

I walk off the stage, clutching my moonman close to me.

I do a few things backstage that need to be done when I spot Brad out of the corner of my eye. He's smiling at me.

"Can you believe it?" I ask as I run up to him and throw my arms around him.

He catches me and swings me around.

"Yes," he laughs into my hair and then sets me down. "I do believe it."

People are walking by us and staring, but I don't care right now. I want to enjoy this moment with my boyfriend.

Did I just think that?

"And there's a couple more to go," he winks at me.

"I'm just happy winning one. Did I sound stupid?"

He pulls my hand and leads me through a door to my dressing room.

"No, you didn't sound stupid. You were great."

"Oh, I didn't thank you guys…the band."

"No one thanks their band," he chuckles as he sits down. He pulls me so that I'm standing between his legs and his arms are around my waist.

"But you guys are the ones there for me every night up on stage. It does mean something to me."

"Well, I accept your thank you and you're welcome."

I smile at him.

"You look beautiful," he tells me as he runs his hands along my waist up to my exposed stomach.

"Thanks. I was going for the funky look."

"Well you look funky and beautiful."

There's a knock on the door.

"Come in," I say as I turn around, still standing between Brad's legs, but now my left side is to his left shoulder.

Tony opens the door.

"Oh good, you're here. You have thirty minutes to get ready so you can stay back here if you'd like."

"Oh…okay."

He smiles at me. "Congratulations," he says as he opens his arms. "Thanks for thanking me."

I walk into his open arms and give him a hug. As much as he can annoy me, Tony is my rock on a daily basis. We've been through a lot.

"You're a daily part of my life Tony…I couldn't do this without you."

"Okay, before I start crying I'll go with the rest of the band and tell them to start warming up," Brad says as he stands up and goes to the door.

I pull away from Tony and laugh. "Okay. I'll see you guys in a little bit."

He flashes that wonderful smile at me and walks out the door.

"Okay, time to change my look."


I stand backstage waiting for them to give me my cue to go on. I try to occupy my mind with other things besides what's going on onstage. The dancers are behind me so I talk to them. I see the band standing off to the side so I make my way over to them.

"Who's that woman approaching us?" George asks as I walk up.

I laugh. "It's just the outfit."

"It's wow. You look great."

"Thanks."

I glance at Brad who's staring at me.

"I was telling Brad before I'm sorry I forgot to thank you guys. You have been with me the whole way and I appreciate that."

"Well we weren't really a part of the video though so we understand…just thank us when you win a Grammy," Troy, the guitar player teases.

I smile at him. "Oh God, no pressure there."

I glance back over at Brad who's still staring at me. I give him a questioning look and before I realize it the rest of the band has moved.

"What's wrong?" I ask looking down at my outfit to make sure nothing's not sticking out that isn't supposed to.

"You're just…wow. I had no idea. I mean I had an idea but…I'll just shut up."

I laugh. "So, you like the outfit?"

"I like it a lot."

"You think my daddy's going to come rushing up on stage and throw a blanket over me?" I giggle.

He laughs. "Most definitely. Well, he'll be wishing he could."

"Ana, they're just about ready," Tony tells me.

"Okay." I take a deep breath.

Brad leans down and kisses my cheek. "I don't want to mess up your make-up. Break a leg."

"I'll be fine," I reassure myself.

I walk over to where Tony is standing. He gives my arm a reassuring squeeze before I walk behind the stairs. I'm handed the mic and inner ear monitor. I put them on and test the sound. I give the technician a thumbs up and then I begin to stretch a little bit. The band takes their place.

People in the audience cheer and applaud so I can only assume someone has walked out on stage. Then I hear, "Some people were just born to entertain. Well, our next performer is definitely one of them. It's in her blood, how can she avoid it?"

Oh God, is that Marcus? They have Marcus announcing me? I look up at Brad; he's watching me. He gives me a reassuring smile so I smile back.

"I've had the pleasure of touring with her. On her own, she's got what it takes to make it big…I don't care who her mom and dad are…ladies and gentleman, Ana."

The wall blocking my set from the audience moves and I climb the first few stairs behind the set so I'm ready when the music starts.

As soon as the music starts, everything seems to happen so fast. It didn't seem to go this fast in rehearsals. Seeing the audience gives me an adrenaline boost I've never felt before. I feel like I have something to prove, but yet, I don't. I'm doing this because I love it and I want people to love it too. Feeling that way makes me smile.

I hit all the right marks, sing all the right notes. As I skip around the crowd in the pit to end my number at the front of the catwalk, I touch their hands and smile at them. These are the fans who make it happen.

I slide to the middle of the catwalk and sing my last note while I'm on my knees and my hands are clutched to my chest.

When I open my eyes I see people standing. It's not everyone…and it's more than just my family. There are other people giving me a standing ovation.

"Thank you," I say as I stand up and take a quick bow. "Thanks."

I blow a kiss and wave as I walk off the stage.

I can't get the smile off of my face. I've never seen Tony's smile this big.

"Oh my God. Girl…"

He hugs me again.

"I never knew you had that in you," he says shaking his head.

"It was good?"

"Oh God…people are going to be like, Britney who?" he kids me.

"Stop," I say slapping his chest as we walk back to my dressing room. His arm is around me.

People along the way tell me what a great performance it was.

When we get to the dressing room and the door closes I jump up and down and scream.

"God Tony, it felt so different up there. I can't explain it."

"You don't have to…I could tell. I hate to rain on your parade but you need to get back into your outfit because Viewer's Choice is up next."

"Oh okay."

I look at myself in the mirror after he leaves and I smile.

"Things have changed," I say with a nod.

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