Careless Mistake
by Kelli
Part 57
Early October 2005.......
"You know, it's pretty pathetic when the photographers follow you all over town," Britney said, throwing the latest copy of the National Enquirer down.
"What's this?" Justin asked as he picked it up. He saw the pictures on the front cover.
"They got us coming out of the doctor's office and then having lunch, drinking white grape juice so they just assume I'm pregnant."
Justin looked at the picture of them toasting their glasses to the pregnancy.
"Yep....they're good," Justin said, throwing the paper back down. "It's their job to be."
He continued working on what he was doing before she came into the room.
Britney sighed and sat down next to him. She wrapped an arm around him and rested her chin on his shoulder so she could see what he was doing.
"You've been writing a lot since we've been here in Orlando."
He nodded and glanced at her. "Yeah for some reason this trip home has inspired me. I wrote a couple of songs in Destin too."
She kissed his cheek.
"I can't wait to hear them."
She started to read the lyrics.
"I always thought you wrote while you were at the piano." She started to let her fingers brush the nape of his hair.
"Usually I do but this time the lyrics were just popping in my head first. I figure I can set them to a melody later. You have to work with what comes naturally."
She nodded.
"Would this be a ballad?"
He stared at the piece of paper in front of him and closed his eyes.
"I'm sorry, you're trying to work," she said as she started to pull away, but he caught her arm.
"No, I was trying to imagine what kind of melody would go with these lyrics," he chuckled. "I like you sitting by me like this."
"Okay....maybe I'll just keep quiet, though. I don't want to distract you."
She took her place leaning up against him again, resting her chin on his shoulder and letting her hand find the back of his neck again.
"Did you ever figure it out though?" she asked softly.
The way she whispered against his neck, sent shivers down his spine.
"I was thinking a ballad," he replied.
She nodded.
"Me too."
He started to write down the thoughts and feelings that were going through his mind at that moment. Most of them revolving around this beautiful woman sitting next to him. The one who carried his first child and is carrying his second. There really are no words to describe that feeling and how much it had changed his life. Sure he had read about it and had heard other men talk about the difference having a child made in their life but he didn't grasp the true concept of it until Mackenzie was born. And he had one woman to thank....
Britney.
"Britney?" she questioned softly.
Her eyes were glistening with tears.
He hadn't even realized what he had written so he sat back and reread it, pulling Britney along with him. She now rested her cheek against his upper arm and had her arm wrapped through his.
"If it's too personal....." she started, but he shook his head as he reread it again.
"Wow," he said in slight shock. "No, it's about you."
She smiled and stared at his profile even though he wasn't looking at her.
"I mean, that's personal but you have a right to read it," he finished.
"It's beautiful....no, it's more than beautiful. It's ummm......deep? Is that the word I'm looking for?" She continued to talk softly.
Finally he turned to look at her. "It's my heart and soul, baby."
A tear slipped down her cheek so he reached up and wiped it away with his thumb.
She leaned into him and gently touched her lips to his.
"Will you really make it into a song?" she sniffed.
"I don't know. Maybe I'll feel too exposed if I make this into a song...."
"I want to keep it if you don't."
"I'm not throwing it away," he chuckled.
He set the notebook down and wrapped his arm around her, pulling her closer and then kissing the top of her head.
"I just feel so much love right now. With you, me and Mackenzie and now this one," he said as he reached around and placed his hand on her stomach.
She placed her hand on top of his and they sat there like that for a few minutes.
"I do too....sometimes I feel almost overwhelmed by it. Do you ever feel that way?"
"In a good or bad way?" he asked with a little concern in his voice.
"Well, not in a bad way....but sometimes I feel it so much that it scares me to loose it. I almost have felt like running away so that I don't loose it or ruin it."
His eyebrows furrow together. "What? Brit, what are you talking about?" he asked as he turned his body a little so he was facing her.
"I don't mean that really," she said shaking her head. "I would never leave you or Mackenzie but there have been a couple of times when my mind wanders and I think about how I'd feel if it were gone. It scares me," she said looking down.
He lifted her chin up so that she looked into his eyes.
"Don't ever be scared by what we have....."
"You aren't understanding....."
But he stopped her. "Yes I do understand what you mean. I feel so overwhelmed right now that there's a part of me that worries about loosing it, but...." he said raising his finger to stop her from talking again, "we just need to cherish it, not be afraid of it."
He wiped another tear from her cheek.
"I'm just being the hormonal pregnant wife," she said, shaking her head.
"Then what am I?" he chuckled.
"You're just always sentimental."
"I try," he smiled.
"Okay....so Mackenzie has a play date at three and then a doctor's appointment the next day at noon," Britney said, looking over her calendar.
"Uh, anything scheduled in there for the adults?" Justin asked peering over her shoulder.
"Not yet.....don't push it. I like the breathing room for a little while longer. So we do have to get back by Sunday at the latest," she said glancing up at him.
He nodded. "Okay, I'll call Tracy so she can get us the jet."
The phone rings so Justin picked it up.
"Hello? Oh hey Bryan. Yeah, thanks," he smiled. "Well, it was a surprise to me," he chuckled, which made Britney look up.
"Yeah, hold on," he said before handing Britney the phone.
"You don't have to keep reminding me, Justin," she whispered before taking the phone.
He shrugged and walked into the kitchen.
"Hey, how's my favorite nephew doing?" Britney asked.
Bryan chuckled. "He's doing just fine. He's taking a nap right now, thank God."
Britney chuckled. "I hear ya. Oh and how is my favorite brother?"
"Ha ha....I'm fine too. I see what you're doing. Paybacks for all those times either me or Lauren called you to see how Mackenzie was doing...."
Britney laughed.
"So I wanted to congratulate you and Justin. I hope it's okay that mama told Lauren and I the good news."
"Yeah, it's fine. I tried calling you guys a couple of times but you weren't there and I didn't want to leave it on your answering machine otherwise I would have told you first. But it's okay that mama did. I told her she could."
"Good, good. So you taking next year off?"
"I have to promote the movie at the beginning of the year and after that I don't know yet. I mean by springtime I won't really have a choice," she chuckled.
"True. Well I hope you take it easy this time...."
"What's that supposed to mean? I took it easy last time," she said studying her nails.
"Well yeah.....but you had more stress. You and Justin weren't married and you weren't sure if the two of you would be together even....."
"You said you always knew...."
He chuckled. "Well yeah, I did, but it wasn't up to me, was it? Let me tell you, you made Justin quite nervous a few times leading him on like that."
"I didn't lead him on," she protested.
"Okay, I didn't mean it that way. It's just that everyone knew your feelings before you did. I felt bad for the poor guy..."
Justin walked back into the room and smiled at Britney before he sat down and turned on the TV. He kept the volume down low.
"Let's change the subject," she said abruptly, which caused Justin to glance over at her.
"You're right, I'm sorry. I didn't call to lecture you. So are you guys going to find out if it's a boy or a girl or are you going to be surprised again?"
She rubbed her forehead. "I don't know, we haven't talked about that yet. It doesn't matter to me so I'll leave it up to Justin."
"Brit.....don't be mad...."
"I'm not mad, Bryan," she said quietly.
Again, Justin turned his head and looked at her.
"I hit a sore spot though and I didn't mean to."
"It's okay. I just feel guilty sometimes. Look sweetie, I've got to go, okay? I'm feeling tired," Britney said.
"Okay. You take care of yourself, okay?"
"I will."
"Love you."
"Love you too, bye."
She hung up the phone and set it down next to her.
"What was that all about?" Justin asked.
She shook her head and was going to say nothing but changed her mind. "He just brought up something that I didn't find as amusing as he did...."
Justin got up and sat down next to her. He touched her leg and waited until she looked at him.
"Like what?"
"Like how I treated you when I was pregnant with Mackenzie. He said I led you on....."
Justin leaned in a little closer and touched her back. "You weren't leading me on......"
"No I know I wasn't but sometimes I get mad at myself for not fessing up to my feelings sooner. We could have had more time together."
"Things always work out the way they do for reasons, okay?"
She nodded and he leaned in to press his lips against hers. She opened her mouth for him and cupped the back of his head. When he pulled away he whispered against her lips, "I'm not going to start anything because I know a little someone is going to be waking from her nap any moment."
Britney smiled against his lips.
"True," she giggled. "We'll have to save it for tonight."
"So what are you going to leave up to me?" he asked as he leaned back against the couch, still caressing her back.
"If we find out the sex of the baby this time," she said in a little more cheerful tone.
"Ohhhh and you're leaving it up to me?"
She nodded. "It really doesn't matter to me."
"Come on, Brit. I know you have an opinion about it. Do you want to know or not?"
"Well I'd like to but if you didn't then that's fine with me."
"Good then it's settled."
He cocked his head to the side a little and continued to watch TV while Britney stared at him.
"What's settled?"
"Whether or not we'll find out the sex of the baby....." he shrugged and continued to not look at her, but stare at the TV.
"Justin," she said, shaking his leg. "What is it?"
"Oh, you want to know how I feel about it?"
She giggled and squeezed his cheeks. "Yes!"
"I think we should find out this time."
He rubbed his nose against hers.
She sighed and leaned back against his side. "Good, me too."